I never met a grit I didn’t like. But I *really* like these grits.

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Every Christmas for the last five years I’ve made shrimp and grits. Just on Christmas Day. And everyone LOVES it.

Yesterday my 8 year old asked me why I only make it once a year. “Why can’t you make it tomorrow?”

I really had no answer for her. Why DO I only make it on Christmas Day?

So.

I bought everything to make it for dinner tonight. And I thought OOH I KNOW, I’LL SHARE MY RECIPE WITH YOU!

I got this shrimp and grits recipe from my sister-in-law who happens to be a fabulous cook. It’s the best I’ve ever eaten. And I’m from the south, y’all.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1 cup grits
1 stick of butter
4 oz of Velveeta cheese, cut into cubes
2 eggs
1/2 cup milk
2 garlic cloves or 2 TBSP chopped garlic
7 slices of bacon, cooked and crumbled
1 green pepper
1 cup mushrooms
2 TBSP flour
1/2 cup chicken broth
2 TBSP lemon juice
1 cup chopped green onions
1 lb fresh shrimp, peeled and deveined
1/4 tsp salt
1/8 tsp cayenne pepper
dash creole seasoning
dash tabasco

OK, so for the grits. Boil 4 cups of water. Add 1 cup of grits. Simmer until done.

Add 1 stick of butter, the Velveeta cubes and 1 TBSP chopped garlic. In a measuring cup, add 2 eggs and then add milk to make one cup.

Pour mixture into a casserole pan and bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes. Um. Yum.

Cook bacon, crumble, and set aside. This next step is very important. Make more bacon than the recipe calls for because YOU WILL EAT IT. And if you don’t cook more than is required YOU WON’T HAVE BACON IN THE SHRIMP AND GRITS.

**Also very important. Keep the bacon grease (also known as nectar of the gods) to saute your veggies in. Trust me, there’s nothing better.

For shrimp: Cook chopped green pepper, chopped mushrooms, 1 TBSP garlic, and 2 TBSP flour. Add 1/2 cup chicken broth and simmer until done.

Then add the next 7 ingredients:
2 TBSP lemon juice
1 cup chopped green onion
1/4 tsp salt
1/8 tsp cayenne
dash creole seasoning
dash tabasco
1 lb shrimp
crumbled bacon

It should look like this in the pan…

By now, your sink probably looks like this:

If you’re anything like me, you probably don’t feel like cleaning up the mess. After making sure your family is in earshot, I suggest you do one of the following…

A. Scream, “OH MY GOD I THINK I’M GOING TO VOMIT!” And then run towards the bathroom with your hand over your mouth.

B. Burst into tears and say, “I feel like I’m dying. Somebody call 911. Or just do the dishes for me. RIGHT AWAY.” Consider throwing yourself on the floor and convulsing.

C. Yell out the phrase, “I’m having a problem with my vagina!” And run out of the room. Trust me, no one will ask you a thing about it.

After successfully excusing yourself from the room, lock yourself in the bathroom. Make sure you have a magazine to read or something else to keep you occupied. You may be in there for awhile. Hopefully someone will check on you, eventually, and when they ask if you are OK, say you’ll be fine but you just can’t cope with cleaning the kitchen. That may work. Good luck.

Anyway, when you finally emerge to find the mess cleaned up…

Scoop grits in a bowl; Add shrimp topping. Commence yummy noises.