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dear ungrateful children who call me mother, i know it seems like i’m here to serve your every whim, but let me be the first to set the record straight. i HAVE to take care of you. i don’t necessarily WANT to…all the time, or on weekends, or during prime time television. we all make [...] it’s happening. my oldest daughter is about to start…..driving! she informed me that she is now eligible to sign up for driver’s ed. is it too late to shove her back up into my uterus? yeah, i thought so. she’s WAY bigger than me now. that would look weird. and it would be like the world’s worst wedgie. people [...] all i wanted was the day off. it started out ok. it was early morning. everyone was asleep and i decided to catch up on the few episodes of oprah i’d missed. i was 10 minutes into last friday’s show when tommy came in the room and said, “wanna go to breakfast with [...] |
 
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