You know how sometimes things just don’t work out?
And you want them to.
You really do.
You cry and you shout and you beg and you promise and you try and you try and you try.
And yet still…
It doesn’t matter.
No one is to blame.
I mean what would be the point?
Blame is for the weak. And for the unlovely. And that is not what we are.
We. Are.
What?
What are the words to describe us?
We love. We bleed. We breathe. We hurt.
Just not for each other anymore.
And that’s OK.
I mean. It is what is it.
I fucking hate that expression.
What does that even mean?
Does it mean that one day we played for the same team and the next…we didn’t?
I love you.
I will always love you.
And most days I wake up and say to myself, “wait, is this really happening?”
It is.
And even though it seems like we won’t, we’ll be OK.
Really.
We will.
Because we are better than this moment in time. In this tiny space in the vastness of the universe, we’re floating, weightless, hapless…and me? Well, I’m constipated. But what else is new.
(Sorry, it was getting a little too serious. I had to make a joke)
Love still lingers.
It’s a different kind of love. But it’s love just the same.
And instead of thinking of this as The End, maybe we should think of it as some kind of New Beginning.
You are. We are.
OK.
{ 35 comments… read them below or add one }
Well.
Wowza.
I hope that whatever is ‘really happening’ really is ‘ok.’
For real. You are one of my favorite people ever and I just want ya to be happy.
MommaKiss´s last [type] ..Do you ever
You’re home and haven’t pooped yet? Oh say it aint so my dear…it’s time for drastic measures. Go get some castor oil(from the pharmacy, not the auto parts store) and OJ, do a 50/50 mix and grab a newspaper.
Also, great post. Very heartfelt and true.
Hockeymandad´s last [type] ..Home
It is what it is.
I fucking hate that expression, too!
And I don’t know what the hell it means either.
But I do get your post. And while you may have some days you don’t feel OK (constipation aside) I so admire your knowing that you ARE OK, no matter what.
Thanks for the reminder, Shauna.
Lisa MB´s last [type] ..I Wish You Were Dead or 5 things to do when you are triggered
Much love. I have been where you are…and it’s hard. But I know that you will be ok.
Also, at Walgreens they have some stuff in a bottle next to the castor oil that is grape flavored. It takes like shit, BUT you will poop…a lot.
YES! It tastes like nasty salty grapes, and I love the way it moves me!
I hate that expression, too. It’s absurd to me. I much prefer ‘it’s all what you make it.’ You can use that one instead, if you want. You already are anyway, just not in so many words.
Kisses to you, for whatever this is.
Here’s to new beginnings.
Piper of Love´s last [type] ..Much Ado About What
You let me cry into your DM box, overflowing into emails, then you comforted me with kind words & guidance. I’m now offering the same to you. *Hug*
Thanks for making me cry, you bitch.
~Liana
“Because we are better than this moment in time.”
Yes. This moment is only leading to another moment and yet another on the path to a new place…and a new happiness. A difficult journey to be sure, but there’s a poignant beauty in it too.
Well said, Shauna.
oof, lady, get thee to a drugstore and get some Milk of Magnesia. MoM knows best.
And I hope it really is okay.
thepsychobabble´s last [type] ..Feel Free to leave a message at the beep
You’re doing what YOU need to do, and it will work out. You’re not a failure, you’re not wrong or bad. Love you.
Avitable´s last [type] ..I am- Im not- I want to be
I can’t believe you haven’t pooped. Stop eating meat. Eat some oatmeal. Drink coffee.
Aside from your constipation I am also sorry you are going through something shitty.
I totally made an unintentional pun.
Seriously, hang in there.
So true. You know where to find me if you need to vent to someone that gets it. Love you and hang in there.
you are. we are. well my love you are amazing and a constant beacon of light to me and many others. we are blessed to know you. in whatever fashion.
now cringe at my non use of capital letters at the beginning of sentences.
Bellawriter´s last [type] ..What You thought I was serious
Love this. And so true. I hope everything is ok and you get through what’s going on with your usual moxie.
HM
Hamlet’s Mistress´s last [type] ..It was magical…
I’m glad you found some way to wrap your heart and mind around things. Love you, Shauna.
Sorry you’re going through this. Been there, cried about it, learned from it. Obviously it wasn’t that easy but as long as you have awesome people to surround you and help you, you’ll come out better.
I’m not sure what’s going on, but hugs. Many and lots of hugs.
Becky Mochaface´s last [type] ..UPDATED – Hump Day Humor- Dry Erase Board Quitter
This weblog is being featured on Five Star Friday -
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schmutzie´s last [type] ..Five Star Fridays 115th Edition Is Brought to You By Douglas Adams
Yellow Dock by Nature’s Way– try it. An herb that gets the bowels moving without agony. A bottle of 100 costs about $5. Take 2 in the a.m with your coffee. Your body will thank me. Not a commercial, just passing on what works for me.
I read this last night, after having a horrible day. I feel all of this. I could have written this. It sucks. *hugs*
I hope it gets better….for both of us.
i haz a hug. you can haz it.
also, i hope you poop soon.
Hannah´s last [type] ..the one where i post from work because my home internet is still messed up
Nice post…hope it’s not as bad as it sounds but it sounds like something is really bad in your life. “It is what it is,” is what my f-tard ex said the first year after our divorce…really learned to hate that expression. I also hate Nickelback…WTF…can they play anything else on the radio? I do like your blog and it makes my day. Hang in there.
Two step cure for constipation: Before bedtime eat a raw, ripe peach. As soon as you get up in the morning, drink a glass of water as hot as you can stand it. Sit at the computer for about 5 minutes and you will be good to go. Really!!!!!
I hate that you’re where you are. Because, if I’m reading between the lines right, I’ve been there, too. And I wouldn’t wish that place on anyone. And even if I’m wrong, I’m sending hugs anyway. ‘Cause you’re one of my favorite bloggers/authors and I don’t like you feeling this way! Hugs, hugs and more hugs.
Jane´s last [type] ..The Life Expectancy of a Blog Or The Phases of Jane’s Blog And Are You Rid Of Her Yet
I only say I’m okay when I’m not okay.
I don’t know you well enough to assume anything about what you’re going through. It sounds sad and I’m sorry.
apathy lounge´s last [type] ..The OTHER Pen Pal
If you say you’re ok then you might be ok. Now, onto the bowels. Definitely stop eating meat, eat tons of lettuce and drink some coffee. You’ll be good as gold in no time.
stay strong
Life is too short to compromise.
LOVE YOU SHAUNA GLENN!!!
XOXO
Allison Zapata´s last [type] ..BlogHer 2010- New York City- Part 1 – In Pictures
Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.
-Winston Churchill
And, you will be okay. We all love you.
Kisha Floren´s last [type] ..Im a Fluffy Girl- Frustration- Vindication- Moderation and Menstruation
Don’t know what the heck is going on, but hugs to you.
Laber of Love´s last [type] ..He is like a freight train that runs over me Repeatedly
Sad.
But you’re right—-all will be well. Love you!
I keep wanting to say something brilliant on this, but I can’t. I will however thank you. Sadly, it can be comforting to know that others are in hell like the rest of us. I admire that you’re still able to find humor in the rest of the world while going through this.
Gamanda´s last [type] ..Why do I scrappily attempt to-s blog
Hugs
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