Comments on: Letterrip Tater Chip (A Contest!)

By: ALL

ALL — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:35:45 +0000

I was at work. I was standing around with a group of girls chatting about whatever. I moved and released the loudest, most horrific sound that has ever come from my body. I know my eyes about bulged out of my head. There was no hiding who the sound came from. I wanted to die. I muttered a horrified “Oh my God, excuse me” and slithered away from the group. I wanted to die. What I’m not sure they knew was that the sound did not come from my back side. It came from my VAGINA. No shit. How does that fucking happen in a group setting? I wanted to quit my job.

By: Amy

Amy — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 16:44:43 +0000

I finally feel amongst people like myself. I, like others, have tons of terrible fart stories but this one is the most memorable.
I was in the 7th grade and I went to swim camp. The first night we had to go and “introduce” ourselves to a stranger. The cutest boy at swim camp sat next to me!….I know, right!…so he was asking me questions and I was giving really cute answers…The counselor then invited us to “introduce” each other the hottest boy ever stood and said “This is Amy….at that moment I ripped the most terrible, smelly, and horrible sounding fart EVER!….I promptly looked at the girl seated next to me and said “gross”..No one fell for it and for the remainder of swim camp I was known as “fart girl”….that humiliation is worth at least $50.00…Thanks!

By: Caitlin

Caitlin — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 14:45:54 +0000

I was working as a TA last semester, and while giving a lecture on the Bill of Rights in an 1113 government class, I had a walking fart pop out. So, I did what any American would do. I gave this dirty looking dude in the front row the stink eye so everyone would think it was him and moved on with the lecture. Due process, people. Due process.

By: Will Woody

Will Woody — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 16:01:17 +0000

Only you Mrs. Glenn could get so many people to tell their fart stories! Bravo!

By: Will Woody

Will Woody — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 15:58:15 +0000

Well, It was more like a shard than a fart. I’m on the operating table, ( not the board game) butt naked anyway except a towel covering my crotch area, scared to death cause they are fixing to cut my chest open. So I’m waiting for the drugs to make me sleepy sleepy.. I can only see the surgical nurses eyes due to their masks. But I can tell they are the surgical nurses that you might find in a special addition Playboy. All of a sudden I feel the urge… But for some reason poo comes out. ( very liquidly ) poo at that. I’m embarressed for exactly 2 seconds, then the anathesia kicks in and I’m out!

By: June

June — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 15:48:18 +0000

About 10 years ago I started taking Xenical (a weight loss pill whose Prescribing Information warns you about oily stool….fun!) I was laying in a tanning bed when I farted- only it wasn’t JUST a fart. Out of my ass, in addition to the smelly fart, was a bright orange colored oil that spread all over the surface of the tanning bed! OMG! Fortuanately for me, the tanning bed place provided a towel to wipe your sweat off (which I promptly used to wipe my ass and the tanning bed off with it!) Now- this towel had the orange colored oil ALL over it and it smelled horrible (as you can imagine). What was I to do with this offensive thing? Well- what any quick thinking girl would do- opened the door to another unoccupied room and threw it in there so as to not get caught! Needless to say- I never showed my face at that Tanning Salon again!